My partner meets all of my expectations for love and affection.

Couples vary in the ways they enjoy offering and receiving affection. Family attitudes, positive and negative experiences, psychological differences, religious teachings, cultural backgrounds, and physical factors all affect a person’s attitude toward sexuality. The deeper a couple’s love is for one another, and the better they can communicate their expectations, the greater appreciation and enjoyment they ordinarily derive from their sexual intimacies.

While studies show that men generally want more sex than women do, women need to feel emotionally connected before wanting to make love. Books that explore the psychological differences between men and women can often prove more helpful in enhancing a couple’s sex life than those that merely address the purely physical aspects of love making.

Married and family life can become very hectic to the point where spontaneous sexual expressions of love may become fewer and farther in between. Couples who find this happening may have to schedule their sexual encounters lest other less important activities harm their relationship. Scheduling may be affected by their respective work schedules, as well as whether they are morning or night persons. Some couples set the stage in the morning by kissing and touching, think and even communicate during the day about what lies ahead, and bring the day to a close at night with a very intimate and even exhausting celebration of their love.

Men and women differ in regard to what turns them on sexually. Generally speaking, here are some ways men have found they are able to please women: create a romantic setting before getting between the sheets; be showered and smell great; don’t rush foreplay; explore all of her erogenous zones; vary your sexual positions; allow her to reach orgasm first. When asked what seems to please men most, here is what a number of women recommend: wear sexy lingerie and remove it slowly; perform fellatio; tell and show him what pleases you; explore all of his erogenous zones; share your fantasies with him; do what you can to reach orgasm with him so as to reinforce his macho self-image.

Lack of sexual intimacy that includes both physical and emotional involvement can seriously threaten a marriage relationship. Couples who cannot resolve this problem on their own should consult a doctor or therapist before it leads to other problems (e.g., substituting pornography for marital relations, infidelity).

Many people have heard the expression, “The greatest gift a father can give his children is to love their mother.” A couple’s outward signs of affection can have a very positive influence on children. Conversely, witnessing a poor relationship may result in low self-esteem and can be an underlying cause of eating disorders and other problems among children. The value of a couple showing affection for one another in the presence of their children should not be underestimated.

Would you like to experience more hugs, cuddling and spontaneous kisses on a daily basis in your relationship? Have you honestly discussed each other’s sexual expectations? Do you believe these expectations are realistic and attainable? Are you both aware of the many positive effects of regular sexual relations (e.g., decreases stress, burns calories, improves self-esteem, reduces coronary heart disease, enhances sleep, aids digestion, boosts the immune system, strengthens emotional bonds, increases longevity)?